Binational Marriages
In most western countries, there is a social order that is not just
different to the one of Tunisia, but in many cases even completely
contradictory.
These significant differences will not make marriages between
Westerners and Tunisians impossible by principle, but the
success rate in the long term is not very high, unless on of the
partners submits to the other - not to speak about the often
encountered " Bezness
marriages".
The absolute prerequisite for a marriage with a Tunisian must be, for
the western part, to know the tunisian society. However, a profund
knowledge can on only be obtained after multiple years of living in
Tunisia - and the same is also true vice versa.
Not without any reason, serious problems begin after living in
"foreign" countrys for 2-3 years, when the initial naive optimism and
the denial of reality disappear. Neither are the western countries
anything like the Land of Cockaigne, in which people
only wait for the mostly untrained Tunisians to arrive and ot
offer them high-paid jobs, nor is Tunisia a country where one can live
happily in a friendly, peaceful and relaxed environment.
Another point is the issue of integration - this is difficult and
sometimes not even desired - both, for Tunisians and Westerners.
Westerners living in Tunisia have, in almost all cases, assets or
receive payments from their home country - in this regard, they are not
really forced to intergrate into the society and/or receive any
welfare, jobs, etc.
On the contrary, Tunisian who move to Europe, need in almost all cases
financing, either by finding work or by claiming welfare. They will, in
most cases, fail, when they are not willing to integrate into the
society and rather persist, like a rock in the surf, on their cultural
identity.
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If they do not
succeed to adjust or gain a success fast, they will even more try to
find salvation in their own culture and traditions.
There is,
therefore, a big difference
between well-situated Westerners who see
themselves as "guests", even long-term, in Tunisia and bring their own
money into the country and Tunisians, who move into another
country and must become there a part of the society, since they depend
on finding a job or getting welfare in that country.
Westerners who
live in Tunisia and are married to Tunisians, face, however, a more
important issue, especially when they are females.
Their personal freedom and independence will be curtailed near the family
or even in the society in general (not even because the husbands wants
it, but because of the family and the whole society) - and, in this
regard, integration is not only expected, but almost unavoidable.
There is a
whole lot information about this topic available in the WWW, along with
reports of personal experiences - the links here
and here
list some places to start a research.
Binational children
Children
of a Tunisian father, regardless of where they are born, will always obtain the
Tunisian citizenship by birth. Being Tunisians,
they are regarded in Tunisia not as bi-nationals, but as true (and
only) Tunisians.
This
means that Western embassies can and will not
intervene in most cases of problems (they are allowed to do so only if
a person does not have the citizenship
of the host country).
Children of
Tunisian mothers with non-Tunisian men, however, will not
obtain the Tunisian citizenship automatically, but only, when both, the
mother and the father, jointly request it).
As the father of a tunisian child (up to the age of 20) has the
unconditional right of determination of residence for the child, a
tunisian child who wants to leave Tunisia must always present the written
consent of its father (even when it is accompanied by the
mother!).
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This
consent is strictly controlled at the foreign police posts on the exit
points of Tunisia (airports, ports, border posts) - if the consent cannot be
presented, the child will be denied to leave the country - without
exceptions.
This consent cannot be fixed by a "marriage
contract" or any contract at all - the father can always, at any time,
change his decision, even in the very last second at an airport
This
leads in some cases of children of western mothers and tunisian fathers
to severe cases of conflict, if, for example, the father travels with
his
child to Tunisia and then denies it to leave the country (
"child abduction").
The "International agreement on the Hague Child
Abduction" has not
been signed by Tunisia (as well as not eg. by Morocco or
Algeria). Therefore, in cases of child abductions, the embassies or
international entities (courts etc.) cannot help.
Whether the mother is entitled to custody or not, she still
has not the power to determine the residence in Tunisia (and some other
Arab
countries). In theory, she could try to enforce her rights in a
Tunisian
court, but the result will be in most cases negative and will always
require significant time and
financial expenses.
If a mother is not absolutely certain that
their children will be able to leave Tunisia, there is nothing
else that can be done than not let them visit Tunisia at all until
their 20th birthday (and for safety reasons, no other Arab countries
either, in case the father tries to enforce his right there).
In other words: the mother has the
"right" to raise her child, but the father is the custodian and decides
in all legal matters on behalf of the child.
And since we are on
this issue - the custody for children can only obtained by a
western woman, when she lives in Tunisia. Even if,
in a "marriage contract", another agreement was taken, it will be void,
because it violates national law
and custom.
The chance that a tunisian court will rule otherwise is next to nothing.
Please
visit also the new Website
Tunisia-Love
which
discusses relations with tunisans
in a
more detailled way!
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